Embracing Differences: Why We Must Reject the Idea That “Some Kids Just Can’t Learn”

There’s a growing and long-overdue movement in support of seeing and valuing Autistic individuals for who they are, not who the world expects them to be. The message is clear: Autistic people are not “less than” or “limited.” They are different, and that difference is something to honor—not erase, not fix, not fear.

Looking at similarities, and differences, in people.

This shift in thinking is empowering. It pushes back against outdated stereotypes that have long painted Autistic individuals as incapable, emotionless, or broken. It opens the door for new understanding, better support, and—most importantly—hope.

But like all change, not everyone is on board.

There’s a growing pocket of opposition. Some argue, “Some Autistic kids just can’t learn...and that’s okay.” And while on the surface, this might sound like acceptance, we need to pause and unpack the real message here.

What appears to be acceptance is actually a limiting belief that can cause harm.

As the author of this piece, let me say this: I absolutely believe in accepting people as they are. Every human being—regardless of neurotype or ability—deserves to be loved, valued, and included exactly as they are.

But I take issue with the idea that anyone “can’t learn.”

That belief? It’s a harmful narrative that needs to be squashed, right now.

Why? Because it’s not true.

People with special needs—including Autistic individuals—often learn differently. Full stop. That doesn’t mean they can’t learn. It means we may need to rethink how we teach. It means slowing down. Adjusting expectations. Looking for the quiet cues. It means seeing the person, not just their diagnosis.

We are all capable of learning. Maybe not the way someone else expects. Maybe not at the speed someone else desires. But learning is part of being human.

So why are some people so quick to assume otherwise?

Because the unknown is terrifying. That’s the crux of it, really.

So many people—especially parents—are scared of what the future holds. Scared of what life might look like for their child. Scared of not having answers. And instead of naming that fear, instead of saying “I don’t know what the future looks like, and that’s hard”—they rush to the conclusion that it’s already written. They place limits. They lower expectations. They stop hoping.

Let me be clear: this doesn’t come from a place of malice. It comes from anxiety. From overwhelm. From heartbreak.

But the danger is this: when we say “they can’t,” we stop trying. We stop supporting. We stop celebrating. And worst of all, we send the message that our loved one isn’t worth the effort.

So if you’re a parent, caregiver, teacher, or friend—please don’t give up on your child, or your loved one, because you’re scared of the unknown. Face each day as it comes. Let go of the urge to predict the outcome. Celebrate the small wins. Be present for the hard moments. And remember: progress is not a straight line.

Let’s keep pushing for a world where differences are respected, not mistaken for limitations.

Let’s believe in every learner—regardless of how they learn.

And let’s call out harmful narratives for what they are: fear, disguised as fact.

You are not alone. And neither is your child. Keep going. One day at a time.

You’re Not Alone

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And remember, early support isn’t just intervention—it’s prevention, empowerment, and connection. And it’s never too early to be curious, ask questions, and seek guidance. We’re here for you, every step of the way. 🍼👣✨

With heart,

The NewDay Child Coaching Team

Rachel Lynn: Communication and Swallowing/Feeding Guide

Amber Michelle: Physical Development Guide

Amanda Rae: Fine Motor, Sensorimotor, Sensory/Feeding Guide

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