You Can’t Pour From an Empty Cup: Taking Care of Yourself to Take Care of Your Child

Parenting is a full-body, full-heart experience — and it can be utterly draining if you don't prioritize your own well-being along the way. We've all heard the phrase "You can’t pour from an empty cup", but what does that really mean when it comes to parenting?

It means that if your physical, emotional, and mental reserves are low, it becomes increasingly difficult to show up as the parent you strive to be. The good news? Taking care of yourself doesn’t have to be grand or time-consuming. In fact, small, intentional acts of self-care not only replenish your well-being but also teach your child how to nurture themselves when they grow older.

Here are a few simple yet impactful ways to fill your own cup:

1. Stay Hydrated

It sounds simple, but it’s easy to forget — especially when you’re juggling snacks, diaper changes, naps, and mealtime routines. Drinking enough water throughout the day helps keep your energy up, your mind clear, and your body functioning optimally. When you take a moment to grab a glass of water, you’re subtly modeling an important act of self-care for your child to witness and eventually emulate.

Pro Tip: Try having a designated water cup that stays with you throughout the day as a visual reminder to hydrate. Rachel Lynn, SLP enjoys flavoring her water with lemon or other fruit--even herbs from the garden--make it more appealing for her. Bonus points if your child sees you prioritize it!

2. Practice Presence

It’s so easy to get caught up in the constant stream of to-dos, but there’s something magical about pausing — even for a few seconds — to ground yourself in the present moment. Pay attention to what you see, hear, smell, or feel around you. Can you feel the warmth of your child’s hand in yours? Can you smell the faint sweetness of their hair after a bath? Being present helps regulate your nervous system, which in turn helps your child feel safe and grounded in your presence.

Try This: Next time you’re with your child, verbally narrate what you notice — "Wow, I hear birds singing outside. Do you hear them too?" This models mindfulness and strengthens your connection.

3. Get Outside (Daily, If Possible)

Nature has a powerful way of resetting our nervous system. Fresh air, natural light, and the sounds of birds or rustling leaves can be incredibly regulating. Even if it’s just stepping into your backyard, taking a slow breath, and noticing a new flower budding — those brief moments outside can shift your entire mood.

And here’s the bonus: your child will witness you engaging with nature, learning that spending time outdoors is a valuable and restorative practice.

No Time for a Big Adventure? Take a barefoot walk in your backyard. Notice the grass. Feel the air. Even a few minutes counts. Snow on the ground? Make some snowballs!

4. Model Rest

Children are watching everything we do — including how we treat ourselves when we're tired. If you’re constantly pushing yourself past your limits, your child may eventually absorb the message that rest isn’t important. But when you pause, take a deep breath, or say, "I need a few minutes to rest my body", you are giving your child permission to value rest in their own life.

Rest doesn’t have to mean an hour-long nap. It can be sitting quietly for 5 minutes with your eyes closed while your child plays nearby. It can be intentionally slowing down your pace instead of rushing.

5. Celebrate Tiny Wins

Some days, self-care might look like a 10-minute walk alone. Other days, it’s simply remembering to eat lunch before 3pm. Celebrate whatever version of self-care you manage to squeeze in — and don’t feel guilty about it. Your child will not only benefit from a more regulated and present parent but will also absorb lifelong lessons about valuing their own well-being.

It’s Not Selfish — It’s Smart

Taking care of yourself is not a luxury — it’s a necessity. And the best part? Every time you prioritize your well-being, you’re subtly teaching your child how to do the same. They are learning that it's okay to take a breath, drink water, rest, or step outside for fresh air when they need it.

We’d love to hear from you — what’s one small act of self-care that helps you feel more present and regulated as a parent? Share your tips in the comments below so we can all learn from one another!

Team NewDay Child Coaching

Rachel Lynn: Communication and Swallowing/Feeding Guide

Amber Michelle: Physical Development Guide

Amanda Rae: Fine Motor, Sensorimotor, Sensory/Feeding Guide

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